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Submitted by Tornado Dragon

SHORT VERSION: With some assistance from the alien boy Meathead, Flash defeats Mad Dog in the “Champ of the Lake” boxing match between Camp Sasquatch (whom he represents) and Camp Patton. With his victory, Camp Sasquatch wins the rights to the whole lake that the two camps share, meaning that Camp Patton has to close down.

Come time for the campers to return home, Flash gets a big kiss from his love interest Cheryl, and he promises to visit her in the near future. Meathead is picked up by his parents and they head back into outer space, with Meathead admitting that he actually had a great time at camp (though he still doesn’t know what “Meathead” means).

LONG VERSION: Colonel Hershy (Hamilton Camp) eventually buys the rights to the lake from Chief Rawhide (Joaquín Martínez), then visits Camp Sasquatch and tells Coach Giddy (Richard Mulligan) about his purchase and says that this year’s “Champ of the Lake” boxing match between their camps will be the last one since Camp Sasquatch cannot stay in business without a lake. Refusing to be beaten that easily, Giddy decides to bluff Hershy by attracting a group of Hare Krishnas to the camp and pretending to want to sell the land to them, which will put the kibosh on whatever plans Hershy has for Giddy’s side of the lake. Hershy sees the priests there and meets with Giddy, and after finding out what Giddy seemingly intends to do, he begs him not to go through with it. Giddy tells Hershy that, in exchange for putting the sale on hold, they will settle the matter at the “Champ of the Lake” match, with some stakes: If Camp Sasquatch’s fighter wins, then Hershy must fork over the rights to the lake to Giddy, but if Camp Patton’s fighter wins, Hershy will get the land like he wanted. Hershy accepts the stipulations.

That night, however, Hershy orders Sgt. Paladin (Blackie Dammett) and the young cadets under his command to sneak into Camp Sasquatch and render their boxer, Boomer (Joe Nipote), unable to fight. They succeed in this task, and the next day, Giddy starts to train as a boxer, intending to take Boomer’s place. Fortunately, after Flash (John Mengatti) sees him training and then gets encouraged by Boomer to try to talk him out of doing the fight, Flash tells Giddy that he will fill in for Boomer, having softened up to the camp by this point. That very night, Hershy sends Paladin and his squad back into the camp to kidnap somebody to find out what Giddy has up his sleeve for tomorrow’s match, and they end up returning to Camp Patton with Flash, who is naked and unconscious after a series of wacky events at the lakeside while on a date with Cheryl (Kim Richards).

Flash awakens the next morning and manages to escape Camp Patton after stealing one of Lieutenant Foxglove’s (John Larroquette) dresses to wear (Foxglove is a closeted homosexual and cross-dresser), and he returns to Camp Sasquatch in time to fight Patton’s boxer Mad Dog (Donald Gibb). The dress-clad Flash gets pummeled all through the first round and into the second, but then Meathead (Felix Silla, voiced by Archie Hahn) – the alien child staying at the camp (which just about everyone is unbelievably okay with) – uses his telekinetic powers to make Flash fly, and Flash lands punches on Mad Dog as he floats around. Hershy soon spots Meathead, and after realizing that he is causing Flash to do what he is doing, he takes a grenade and sneaks under the bleachers with it to blow Meathead sky high. Thankfully, before he can pull the pin on it, he is foiled by Tommy (David Hollander), who had followed him and then forced himself out of his wheelchair to shove him down and make him lose the grenade. The noise gets Meathead’s attention and causes him to break his concentration on Flash and make him fall into the ring, and he then focuses his powers on the grenade and chases Hershy out of the building with it before making it explode and injure him. Flash then knocks out Mad Dog on his own merit to win the match for Camp Sasquatch. The groggy Mad Dog tries to jump Flash from behind after the bell, but he collapses as he gets near him, pulling down the dress and exposing his naked body in front of the Sasquatch supporters. The female counselors express great approval at the size of his penis, especially Cheryl, who has never seen one in person before.

Later on, as Hershy is being loaded into a military ambulance bound for Camp Patton, he pleads with Giddy to reconsider their deal. Giddy refuses, and before Hershy is taken away, he warns Giddy that he hasn’t heard the last of him. When the campers and counselors start going home at the end of the summer, Flash and Cheryl say their goodbyes and she gives him a big kiss, and he promises to visit her. Meathead bids his cabin buddies farewell before taking off back to his home world with his parents, and he tells his father that he actually had a great time at camp. His father briefly questions the meaning of his new name, but Meathead admits that he doesn’t know what it is, and his father just chooses to accept it.